The laughing policeman


I know a fat old policeman, he’s always on our street
Fat jolly red-fasced man, he really is a treat
He’s too kind for a policeman, he’s never known to frown
And everybody says he is the happiest man in town.

He laughs upon point duty, he laughs upon his beat
He laughs at everybody while he’s walking down the street
He never can stop laughing, he says he never tried
Well, once he did arrest a man, and laughed until he cried

He jolly face it wrinkled and then he shut his eyes
He opened his great mouth, it was a wondrous size
He said I must arrest you, but he didn’t know what for
And then he started laughing until he cracked his jaw

So if you chance to meet him, when walking round the town
Just shake him by his fat old hand and give him half a crown
His eyes will beam and sparkle, he’ll gurgle wth delight
And he’ll start in laughing with all his blessed might.

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